Month: December 2022

This Christmas has been one of the hardest yet. I thought that they would get easier as time went on, but that’s not the case. I tried so hard to get into the Christmas spirit. I know those around me love the season and I know my mood brings them all down. I would do anything to be different but I’m not. This year I bought my first gift in November. Got all fired up to make changes. To be more festive. My husband nagged me to get the wrapping down early so it didn’t end up a last-minute task … Continue reading “I thought Christmases would get easier.”

I’m feel I’m out my depth again. Treading water knowing the big waves are heading my way. I get like this each year. Watching everyone else preparing and celebrating the season. But no matter how hard I try to get caught up in their revelries, it’s just out of reach, like it’s brushing past my fingertips but I just can’t grab hold. I’ve started writing lists again. Of all the things I need to cross off before the big day comes. Order prescriptions, write cards, buy gifts and get them wrapped. I realise how far behind I am on being … Continue reading “All out of Christmas cheer”

I’ve had a new house, new husband and new career. You have a granddaughter that you never even knew about. 10 years has literally been a lifetime but not a day goes past where I don’t miss you and am not grateful for all that I am thanks to you. There are so many times I have gone to pick up the phone. To call you. To tell you. Jonny? He’s so clever, he’s cheeky, he’s funny and his heart is so big. He’s going place. The spark in him will light fires. And Katie’s so beautiful. A voice like … Continue reading “A lot can change in 10 years”